For most people, regardless of age, moving from one relationship to the other is not uncommon.
Although most relationships seem perfect initially, they stay just a short time then fall apart. One time you are doing well, but within a short time, you can no longer understand your partner. You are totally disconnected.
Sounds familiar? While there are countless mistakes one can make in a relationship, here are the five prevalent yet costly ones that might be ruining your relationship.
5 Top Mistakes That Ruin a Relationship
1. Failure to communicate
They say communication is the lifeline of any relationship. Most men rarely communicate. They just want to walk through something without really having to talk about it. On the other hand, most women expect men to read their minds, which is highly unlikely.
In fact, when they do, they do it wrongly. This strains the relationship to the point of breaking. Even the best relationships break the moment there is no communication. Communicate clearly what you want and what makes you happy.
Additionally, if you do not create time for each other, the relationship is doomed. A career is essential. However, ensure you make time from your busy schedule to make time for your partner.
Quality time together makes the bond stronger as you can communicate well with your partner. It is also imperative to understand your partner’s work schedule so that the issue of giving you time will never come up.
2. Trying to change your partner and focusing on the negatives
Ever tried to work on something to change yourself? Well, you know how hard that can be. Something as simple as getting yourself to lose some pounds. When it comes to your partner, changing them is even more challenging. For this reason, never get into a relationship expecting to change them into a character you can live with.
Many times, at the beginning of a relationship, there might not be much that you want to change. Your partner is almost perfect! However, you start to see their different side with time, which might not suit your preferences.
Attempting to change them is one of the grievous mistakes that ruin the relationship. Try to look at the few things that you appreciate about your partner. After all, no one is wholly negative. Focus on those things. This makes you feel more positive about them.
3. Keeping your Ex too close with unrealistic expectations from your partner
How close is your Ex to you? Many relationships break due to keeping the Ex too close. To your partner, it seems like you did not really get over them after the relationship was over.
Texting them through the night and calling to check on them in the morning is something that will put your current partner off. Your partner should not have to deal with this.
This does not mean that you keep them off. They might still be your friend, and maybe, you even have children together. However, it is imperative to check the limit of your interaction with them to avoid hurting your partner.
It is also crucial to remember that no one is perfect. Always give your partner time to grow. There is yet so much that they do not know about you. Therefore, they need time to know you better, know what you love, and learn not to step on your toes.
Give them time to make mistakes. After all, eventually, it gets better, and for it to happen successfully, you have to be patient.
In addition to this, if you have unrealistic expectations for your partner, your relationship is destined to fail. Remember that getting an ideal person with all the qualities you want is absolutely impossible! Do not focus too much on the qualities you want in a partner.
Focus on their positive side and what they already have. Eventually, you begin feeling good about them.
4. Avoiding confrontation, blaming them for everything, and not apologizing
Confrontation in relationships is healthy! Yes, you heard me right. While some things are not worth addressing or arguing about, some things need to be addressed in detail to make the situation better.
The tough talks are very healthy in a relationship from time to time as they help improve a situation. When some critical issues in a relationship are not addressed, one of you is bound to be hurt, stay angry, and frustrated daily.
In a confrontation, most people’s mistake is always blaming the other person. Do not let your ego ruin your relationship. If you realize you were wrong, not apologizing only hurts your partner.
Never lose the sense of whose fault it is. Always apologize the moment you realize that you made a mistake. In any case, the words ‘I’m Sorry’ are known to save so many relationships.
If your partner confesses something they did in deep talks, judging them blindly makes them more conserved in a future argument. This comes down to a relationship full of secrets that eventually do not last.
5. Failing to take care of yourself
Failure to care for yourself. This is a simple yet very costly mistake that ruins a relationship. As is the case most of the time, being in a relationship should not make you stop doing exercises, going to a gym, or even make you unconscious of your dressing.
It is imperative to note that one of the reasons you fell in love with each other was your physical appearance. For this reason, you should maintain this. Self-care is vital in a good relationship.
Ensure that you take care of yourself emotionally, physically, spiritually, and even mentally. This will make you a better partner to your romantic partner.
The other grievous mistake is not keeping your relationship private. Be very careful about the kind of information you share with friends and relatives. This is because once your partner knows you have been sharing intimate details, it will be almost impossible to have them trust you again.
Talk of trust. Willfully keeping a secret in your relationship will definitely ruin your relationship. If you are beginning, learn to tell the truth and give them all the necessary information for the relationship. Trust, once broken, is hard to build. Close to impossible. Thus, do everything that it takes to build and keep it.
Final Thoughts
In the education system, there are not many instructions on relationships. This explains why even the most educated laid-back individuals can get so dramatic when it comes to relationships. No one loves being rejected.
After a series of broken relationships, we tend to get too cautious. We want the new partner to declare their stand as early as possible to avoid being hurt once more. Now, this is yet another mistake. Your new relationship has a better chance of survival if it is eased into.
This will ensure that your partner does not feel rushed. After all, it is not all about the destination. Enjoy the process too!