You want to make it clear to someone that you simply want to be friends. We often meet people who admire us, become attracted to us, or even believe that we want to be more than friends with them, which is not the case.
This would imply that they are acting in a way that indicates that they want to be romantically involved or “more than friends” with you, which you do not share. There are healthier alternatives. While avoiding the difficult conversation may provide solace, addressing it directly invites growth.
How To Tell Someone You Just Want to Be Friends
As much as you may not want to deal with the situation, ignoring them, attempting to remove them from your life, or avoiding it not only worsens the situation but can put one or both parties in a bind.
Knowing how to respond to such situations in a clear, calm, and respectful manner can help prevent the ugliness of disagreements and heartbreaks. Here’s how to begin the discussion so that it’s less painful for both parties:
1. Honesty Is the Key!
There’s no need to hide behind lies and half-truths when not communicating clearly can only lead to misunderstandings. Remember to be truthful about why you are feeling this way.
Let the person know that you enjoy spending time with them, but you don’t see a romantic relationship developing. Your friend should understand and respect your reasons for preferring to keep the relationship platonic between you both.
2. Be Clear with How You Communicate
Make sure to use “I” in your statements. Saying things like “I realized that I’m not romantically interested in you” with a dash of “I would definitely like to be your friend if you don’t mind” are examples.
Use factual statements and avoid allowing emotions to interfere. Make sure there are no interruptions or interference during the whole conversation.
3. Be Considerate of Their Feelings
We are so focused on how awkward the conversation is for us that we forget how they feel when they are rejected.
Honesty is essential, but that shouldn’t necessarily imply yanking off the band-aid like it’s nothing. Don’t have this conversation if the relationship is obviously still strained or if the person is in a bad emotional state.
Remind them of who they are and how wonderful their personality is. Assure them that it was not their fault. Pain is unavoidable, but don’t give in to sentiment and say things like “I love you” or anything else that suggests the possibility of a relationship developing because it will only hurt.
4. Offer Support
They might not want to be friends with you after confessing their feelings for you, which is fine; don’t force it on them. It’s important to respect the person’s feelings and give them the space they need to process what you’ve told them.
Let them know that you are still there for them. Although you have good intentions, be careful not to send mixed signals.
Remember, communication is key in any relationship. By being honest, respectful, and kind, you can tell someone you just want to be friends in a way that is considerate of their feelings.